A Hard Act To Follow

PRINCIPLE#5:

THE RIGHT THING IS SOMETIMES THE HARD THING

“Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you; they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.” - Bernice Johnson Reagon

Doing the right thing is often the hard thing. It is the action that calls upon your fortitude, your strength, your courage and your resiliency. It is a measure of your character and an indication of your values and beliefs about yourself and the world around you. Most people do not make a change or do the thing that is right for them in their life, until the pain created by whatever they need to quit or do or fix is greater than the perceived pain of changing. A person, who lives life On Purpose, is willing to embrace the temporarily hard, uncomfortable and difficult because they know that it is through this gauntlet of emotion, this trial, this challenge, that the greatest reward can be attained. It is an affirmation of your life and a sign of trusting yourself, when you can say, do, be and respond despite being wrong or feeling of discomfort. It is saying, “I am worth it, I have respect for myself and others and I will not do what is easy, because I will easily lose myself.” I will do what is uncomfortable and I will hardly feel the pain.

“Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems more challenging.” - Joseph Campbell

THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE

I do not have a belief that life has to be hard, but there will be moments of discomfort. Think of growing pains. Many of us experienced them. They were a necessary part of growing into adulthood and so too are the growing pains of life; a necessary part of growing into more of yourself. Circumventing and avoiding growing pains at all costs, is definitely easier but will result in you limiting your potential. When you embrace the discomfort of certain emotions and welcome change as an opportunity for growth and long-term fulfillment, the harder thing is embraced in favor of immediate gratification. Our society is enraptured with the idea that all the nuances and particular emotions of a so-called negative nature, can be medicated, ignored, blamed or shuffled away. It is condoned and endorsed; encouraged even, to see our technological and medical “quick fixes” as a sign of advancement; eradicating the difficult with a pill, a push of the button or a multitude of distractions, cleverly marketed as happiness and satisfaction. Although it is possible to experience rapid changes in your life, the term quick fix is often used as an euphemism for ignore or pacify. A culture seeking immediate gratification or elimination of all hurdles is one where the opportunity for metamorphosis is lost. How many times have you avoided, denied or excused the challenge in front of you , done what felt better or easier in the moment only to then be faced with it again and again, growing in perpetuity and force? As you begin to respond rapidly to moments of uneasiness and strife, you evolve more effectively, often avoiding the full blown pain that comes from ignoring the niggling reminder that it is time to adapt, alter or change course. Handling the challenging and awkward in the moment will pave the way for less resistance and more fulfillment in your life and eventually hard is replaced by ease.

LIVE A LIFE OF EASE

Imagine a world where no one ever embraced the challenge but instead continuously took the easier option? Imagine if Mandela had done the easy thing or Mother Theresa. Imagine if the pioneers had done the easy thing. Imagine a world where in your daily life, driven by a higher vision of yourself you did the “right” thing for you; the thought, belief, action that developed your character and caused you to grow? Imagine if you said no when you needed to, asked for help when you were uncomfortable, apologized when you made a mistake, engaged in the awkward conversation, gave up a habit or vice that is damaging you or started one that nurtures you. Imagine that you stopped pushing aside the unhappiness and discomfort because it feels good right now. Imagine that right now you perceived the harder in your life as a message and a catalyst for change. Imagine the quality of your life if you created a compelling future. A future that bolstered you to embrace the sometimes menial, difficult and challenging as welcome signs that you are creating a life lived, On Purpose. What if you supposed the harder option as the righting of your course and aligning your true self with the path that leads to a more beautiful view?

“There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination. Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment, on a small scale, by successive developments, cellularly, like a laborious mosaic. “- Anaïs Nin

TWELVE WAYS TO APPLY THIS PRINCIPLE:

1. Create a compelling future.

2. Let go of the illusion that feeling bad is bad. It is simply a message.

3. Learn to embrace the discomfort in your life as an opportunity for change or improvement.

4. Let go of the illusion that life has to be hard. You will live with more ease when you take responsibility and respond to the discomfort.

5. Strengthen you mind - talk back to the easy and do what is in line with your purpose.

6. Surround yourself with people who gave up easy in favor of growth.

7. Take stock of the blessings in your life. Use gratitude daily.

8. Know that, “this too shall pass” but the outcome is affected by your response in the moment.

9. Change your routine, try new things – this will get you used to being slightly uncomfortable.

10. Notice areas where you are quite often uncomfortable or unhappy etc. Respond to it immediately.

11. Get support from a friend, family member and life coach as you embrace a new way of doing things.

12. Try to find the humor in your life and in the challenges.

If you would like support creating a life of ease, please send me an email at, onpurposelifecoaching@hotmail.com.