"I Can't Complain"

I INVITE YOU TO:

“You don't make progress by standing on the sidelines, whimpering and complaining. You make progress by implementing ideas.”

~ Shirley Hufsteddler  

Ok, I admit it; I can complain quite well. I can get on the bandwagon and ride it around a few times. When I am not taking full responsibility for my life I will notice more thoughts popping up that highlight all that is wrong, rather than all that is right. Isn’t it helpful to release pent up feelings and emotions? Yes, it can be. Releasing is helpful but what we are talking about here is repetitive complaining; the kind of complaining that literally blinds you from seeing the options or blessings in your current circumstance. Complaining is buying into the negative thoughts roaming around in your head and puts you at the mercy of life and others and robs you of the power that comes from owning your life.

WHO’S TO BLAME?

We complain because it is a habit that gives us the illusion of asking for help or looking for a solution and it allows us to put the blame “out there.” Complaining is really the absence of taking full responsibility for your life. It can be scary to absorb 100% of the creative license for your reality. It can be overwhelming and you may not be ready to assume all of it. Who will you blame if you fail? What if you do it wrong? What if after all is said in done you screw it all up? These limiting thoughts can keep you in a cycle of negativity, blaming and ultimately complaining. Unfortunately this leads to an energy signal, belief system and consequently the manifestation of more of the same.Complaining does not work as a strategy.

"We all have finite time and energy. Any time we spend whining is unlikely to help us achieve our goals. And it won't make us happier.”

~ Randy Pausch

WHO SHOULD I DIRECT MY COMPLAINT TO?

So where do you begin? Observe, detach and replace your thoughts. Thoughts happen – all the time. Some are more empowering than others. But they are, after all, just thoughts. They only matter when you attach a meaning to them or incorporate them into your identity. Identifying with the grouchy little thoughts is an addiction. I don’t want you to resist your thoughts. I want you to welcome them – all of them as a way to raise your consciousness. Over time you will begin to disregard, ignore and quickly reframe those little suckers, without so much as a bead of sweat. These thoughts are part of your subconscious programming; a result of long held beliefs about your abilities and worth. As they come to your awareness, hear them, do not resist them. Observe the negative and ask for the message. What are you afraid of? What must you believe to have that thought?

I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY LIFE?

The cycle of complaining does not to need to be a permanent state and will cease, as you cease giving over the power in your life. Begin by accepting responsibility for the good in your life – it was not an accident or a fluke. You created it. As you extend your gratitude in this way, you open yourself to the possibility of taking responsibility for the not-so-good. This is the portal to transformation. Next say, “I want to accept more responsibility for everything in my experience.” Examples of taking responsibility: If I’m unhappy, it’s because I’m creating it, if I do not like certain people in my life, I have invited them, if I want something, it’s up to me to achieve it, if I don’t like my present reality, I must change it. This is not about spewing false positivity; it is about embracing the true magic of being a human – the magic that you are creating. When my clients fully embrace this truth, their reality is transformed. If you catch yourself engaging in complaining, stop and ask yourself what will you gain by jumping on the bandwagon, chasing those thoughts? What could change if you stepped into your responsibility? I would rather celebrate what I have consciously created - rather than, complain and continue to unconsciously create what I do not want.

Life coaching combined with EFT is extremely effective at eliminating limiting beliefs and empowering a person to take full responsibility for their lives. If you would like more information please contact me at, onpurposelifecoaching@hotmail.com